When Something Goes Wrong
Occasionally, you may have the bad party guest... the
one who manages to disrupt the party or act in a manner that offends your other
guests. He could be the jackass that brings a fistfull of condoms with him, or
the one who gets falling-down drunk, or brings his personal drama to your party.
What do you do? First, do not lose your cool. No matter how obnoxious the bad
guest is, your best defense is to try to remain calm and get him out of the party.
Take him aside, and find out what the problem is. If you can't find a way to resolve the
problem within five minutes, give him his clothes and ask him politely to leave. If
that doesn't work, you can tell him in your most patient voice that his ass is
going to end up out on the street without his clothes if he doesn't get dressed
and leave the party immediately. Make no other threats. Give him to the count of ten and then
toss his bag of clothes out the door. You gave him warning. The idea here is to get him out of the party in as non-hostile
a manner as possible.
If he's falling-down-drunk, it is best to not send him out where he could hurt
himself and others. If possible, arrange for him to crash somewhere. Have a friend
drive him home, or call a taxi. Just make sure he's dressed and has his keys before he goes out
to meet the cab.
If the problem is between two guests who have decided your party is the place
for them to start a shouting match or fist fight, again, take them aside and let them know they
will either have to get along peacefully or they will both have to leave. Do not
pick sides. Just get them to quiet down or get them out of your hair. You have
enough to do at your party without having to play Kindergarten Teacher.
Putting It In Writing
The best way to inform your potential guests as to what
you'll allow and what you won't is to put that information in your invitation. When
someone responds to your ad via e-mail, send them an invitation with the party
do's and don'ts as well as the specific date, time, and place information. It will
insure you against a whole bunch of problems on the night of your party. It is a good
idea to let them know that you expect them to commit to your party. Give a time
frame for regrets so that you know by the day of the party how many to expect.
For your benefit, I have included a link to the invitation I've most recently used so you may
refer to that as a template of sorts. It's VERY thorough. You may not feel the need to be as
thorough in yours, however I will remind you that this invitation has been developed
after ten years of throwing parties. And of course, when you think you've finally got
it all covered, someone will do something you never could have imagined anyone capable
of doing, and yet they do it. In your house, in the middle of your party. So you handle
it, and then you add that to your invitation before the next time.
If you'd like to see my bareback party invitation,
Most Of All, Have Fun
I hope these tips help you in planning a successful fuck party.
Of course, you will have to tailor certain things to your guests. But the key to
success is to get the party going, and then have a hot time yourself. Most parties run
themselves, and about all you need do after it gets underway is change the music every now and again, and just see that
your guests are enjoying themselves. I wish you success in your every party!