Dear Jack,
Need to find me a very very good plastic surgeon to turn me into the hot, hot, bubble butt, headturning, porn star quality, most fuckalicious bareback bottom that I am meant to be. Can you recommend someone?
~ Sincerely, Pussyboy.
Be Yourself? or Be a Barbie Boy?
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Dear Pussyboy,
Hmmm... Do I detect a note of sarcasm in there?
At first I wasn't sure how to take your request. And then I thought, "Why is he asking ME??? It's not like I've had plastic surgery or anything." Do I look like I did???
Then I had a smartass answer about avoiding the plastic surgeon that a certain asshole pornstar I don't like very much uses.
And after getting that out of my system, I thought about your question more seriously. Then something entirely different occurred to me. But before I launch into that, I'll tell you that I do not know of any plastic surgeons I can recommend.
In mulling your letter around in my mind, I found myself wondering why you would write me with that kind of request. It sounds both sarcastic and self-deprecating at the same time. Could it be that you are harboring a little resentment toward the more model-esque men found in a lot of porn? Do you really think that such physical excellence is required just to get laid?
It does get a little challenging to find fuckmates in cities where there is a high percentage of single gay men. And remember... we're talking about the gay community. There is, was, and always will be a high premium on physical attractiveness and perfection, in addition to the usual youth and beauty. In such highly-concentrated environments, there is a lot of competition to look FABULOUS. Actually being fabulous apparently isn't as important.
In order to stay in the running, men will join gyms [and for the excuse to cruise in the locker room]. They will also go as far as having pectoral implants, bicep implants, hair implants, electrolysis, botox, skin peels, permanent makeup, liposuction, and plastic surgery. They will drink massive quantities of protein drinks and take steroids. And their dicks will shrivel. So then they have penoplasty (surgical lengthening of the penis) or take up vacuum pumping. Some will even undergo foreskin restoration surgery. For all the money they spend on trying to outglam the neighbors they could have the most fab-fucking-tastic home theater system AND a leather couch that pulls out to sleep seven.
Now, what does that actually say about these people? It says they aren't happy being as their DNA designed them. It says that they put a huge emphasis on the superficial ~ especially the men who dump all sorts of garbage into their bodies when they party. Jewel on the outside, junk on the inside. It's a human oxymoron. Anyway, I truly believe that men (and women) who go to the doctor to have improvements made on nature's work do so out of either insecurity or fear. The fear thing can be a biggie... fear of aging, fear of rejection, fear of not being invited to the hottest parties...
I'm not knocking physical fitness. Working out at the gym is a good idea. It requires discipline, physical exertion, and focus. Working out also creates endorphins and releases adrenaline. And the results are a better body all the way around. Other sporting activities are equally as good: hiking, biking, blading are activities my friends do with passion. I would recommend the zen of working out far above the immediate gratification of going to a plastic surgeon.
But there are those who either can't accept that they just don't have the kind of body that regular working out will ever result in the kind of lean and sinewy musculature you see on Soloflex models. And there are also those who haven't the patience to make it happen naturally, so they get their chests and arms and butts plumped out with silicone and the fat sucked out of them to achieve the same look in a fraction of the time.
And then there's the rest of us. The yang to that yin consists of men who have accepted that they are less than perfect and use other means to attract attention. Dressing fabulously for your style and body type is one way to go. Some use their bodies as a canvas and express themselves with tatoos and body jewelry. And in the big cities, everyone pretty much has a schtick they've developed... a look, an attitude, a unique mannerism or style, or just a reputation will do. It's all PR.
My point with all this is simply that you are as you are born to be. Not everyone is drop-dead gorgeous, or has a body to die for, or carries a donkey-sized dick. A huge segment of the population is "average". And a smaller number falls outside of that norm and just does not have the raw materials necessary to transform themselves into gods. I fall into that group. I'm just a tall, skinny guy, and I'm pretty comfortable being that way. But I also know how un-comfortable I make men who are fixated on the superficial when I cruise them. However, I wasn't always so comfortable with my body.
Through most of my twenties the thought of being nude among groups of other men scared the shit out of me. I got over that by getting naked in front of other guys, and they didn't run away screaming. Then I had a dream to be a pornstar. But I had to wait until I was 40 before the opportunity arose. And truth be told, I got the opportunity because I fathered the idea for the video and weaseled my way into it. I've gotten a dozen or so pieces of email since that have asked if I would be in any more videos, but the phone hasn't rung from anyone casting for a video. I can take a hint. And I'm cool with that. I know I'm not everybody's cup of tea.
And that brings me to my last point: why porn studios pick who they do. Serious porn studios are in business to make money. And the best way to make money in the porn industry is to produce something that will appeal to the largest audience. In this community, physical appearance and dick size matter a great deal. Much more so now than in the early days of gay flicks. Still, the not-so-perfect of us can also take heart in knowing that there are lots of little amateur studios that make videos to appeal to niche audiences. The problem is that the niche stuff only really sells to the niche audience. Those videos aren't often hugely visible. Many go unknown. And so do their stars.
The challenge we all face from childhood on is the acceptance of ourselves. In my system of belief, I feel that we are all made to be as we are ~ that we are perfect in our natural state. All the efforts made to improve that perfect self are done largely out of vanity. Whatever your "self" is, it's how you were born to be. Learn to be proud of what you are instead of comparing yourself to someone else's superficial exterior. Chances are good they'd be more insecure about themselves than you.
~Bareback Jack.
PS: You don't have to be a pornstar to fuck like one. Stick that ass in the air and ride your tricks with gusto, baby! And don't forget to moan and grunt and beg for that cum.
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